When it’s over…

So I got a couple posts in me today…first I need to actually say my peace about the BFF that is no more…

It was a lot of one sidedness…I would show that I was happy or sad for her and would give of myself…I didn’t get that in return and with certain relationships she was an even shittier friend. A college boyfriend of her almost brought me to tears for no reason other than he was a complete and utter douchebag….and she said nothing to him about it. Her almost ex husband would butt into our conversations and be outright nasty to me saying mean and ugly things, and I don’t know why to be honest other than as it turns out he was a HUGE steaming pile of shit…and her response to him when he did this was to just laugh. Now with her new relationship…every conversation we were having…anything I said involving myself or my family was completely ignored and she would only talk about him and his kids and how happy they were…and great I’m all for that…but why are you ignoring anything I say that doesn’t revolve around you? Her response was “I have a lot going on in my life right now.” ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? And I don’t? Why else would I be trying to talk to my best friend….and I got nothing…then she continued to send me snapchats all self involved with that relationship and I asked her why? She said she was sending them to everyone. I said well stop, in case you haven’t figured out I’m pissed and everything you’re snapping to me only further proves my point! This was answered with “You’re being ridiculous.”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

That was my breaking point.

I spent 20 years being a great friend and when we fought…I was the one who apologized. When her husband cheated on her, I let her come stay with my family for a while. She didn’t want to work, or have any help in figuring out how to manage the little money she did have, she just sat around and moped, and yes I know her life had just fallen apart but we were trying to help. She also kept throwing my daughter under the bus…tattling on her like a little sister tattles…so we told her she had to go stay with her mom. We didn’t talk for a few months and then again…I was the one who went first. I apologized…she never did.

I’ve been afraid to actually cut her off because that’s just me, I give and I’m caring and I hate losing people. But to be told that I’m being ridiculous because I think my best friend should reciprocate the care and everything that I show her and maybe be a little less self involved…show me some support…no I’m sorry I’m done. I will not continue to sit here and be shit on.

Am I sad? Hell yes, my heart is broken…but I have to think about myself…and I’m going to be selfish and ridiculous and continue to operate under the thought that a friendship should be an equal two way street of give and take. I’m done. She still hasn’t tried to contact me…so whatever.

Today I decided to work out some aggression towards her and get some good shit for my ArtisticRageTherapy instagram page…

So I decided to light some shit on FIRE!!!

The first is a page she made for my Wreck This Journal. I cut it back out and burned it…then she made this Perler Bead Ariel to look like my tattoo of Ariel…I melted the fuck out of it!

And I gotta say I feel so much better! I needed that!

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And my personal favorite…right there in the trash with the cat shit!
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I also wrecked the page I had made for us in my smashbook.
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Good Riddance…